Raska Holdings are a company in Serbia which have fallen on extremely hard times since the fall of Yugoslavia in the 1990s. So hard in fact that they can’t actually afford to pay their workers. Like, ever. So while these guys have been existing off state benefits and so on, some have been protesting. How do you protest not having any money to buy food for your family? Why, go on a hunger strike of course. That’ll really show them – if they weren’t bothered by your hunger already, why would they be bothered when you’re doing it on purpose?

Anyway, one foreman took it into his head that he would show them once and for all – by sawing off his little finger and eating it in front of them. This is rather an unorthodox tactic, I will admit. The reason is supposedly that a single mother of three kids had said she would do it first, and he wouldn’t let that happen. So instead of talking her out of it, he did it to himself. You know, as you do.

The man himself said afterwards that “We, the workers have nothing to eat. We had to seek some sort of alternative food and I gave them an example. It hurt like hell.” Well, yeah, it kind of does hurt when you use a hacksaw on a bodily appendage and then eat it, without any pain killing medication.

Protests are like a breeding ground for weird actions, I swear. Fathers 4 Justice protestors like to pretend they’re Spider-Man and climb buildings to sit there for a few hours while people down below run around like headless chickens, paranoid that Spidey has a thermonuclear bomb hidden up his backside. Then you have people protesting capitalism or globalisation, complete with mobile phone in their hand ready to video the police officer they’re goading so when he snaps they can run to the tabloid press and get a nice healthy payout for their story.

It goes with that old saying really – “Bombing for peace is like fucking for virginity” – and it is absolutely true.

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